 | The Queen of Self-Inflicted Drama | May 9, 2005 |
welcome to the annafication! i have learned to update my multiply. feel free to look around. everything posted on ahnnabanana.livejournal.com gets cross-posted here. enjoy! In celebration of the UPCAT results, I decided to post an essay I wrote about UP for a Creative Writing class (CW 141: Creative Non-Fiction) almost two years ago. I loved that class 'cause I was surrounded by some of the most talented and smartest people I know. This essay was later on published in Ampersand.
It isn't hard to find writing inspiration when you study in a school as alive as UP Diliman. I swear, everyday is a brain spa. This is particularly for my cousin Eena Fortun and my good friend Yanah Laurel, who will both be in CAL next semester :)
***
Anna Oposa loves UP. Whenever Anna Oposa says she’s from UP, she hears reactions such as: “Wow!” or “Ang galing mo!” and most of the time, “Matalino ka pala?!” But whenever Anna Oposa says she’s an English Studies major from UP, reactions are: “Um… Wow…” or “So… Magiging teacher ka?” and occasionally “Dahil ba Ingglesera ka?” Not that she minds. Anna Oposa loves being an English Studies major in UP. She had planned on taking up BS Psychology as her pre-med but God Buddha Mother Nature her UPG didn’t make the cutoff. At least people automatically assume that she’s well read and cultured. They always remark, “You’re taking English? Grabe! Nosebleed!” Anna Oposa mentally rolls her eyes. “Nosebleed” is the term for commoners and mortals. She prefers to use the term “epistaxis.”
In some ways, Anna Oposa is a stereotypical English Studies major. During her free time, Anna Oposa loves to analyze the nuances of SMS language (How does one read “Di ako maka2punta sa prac 2day. Ba2lik aq bukas. Namatay kc ti2 ko.”?), think about punctuation marks (“Bawal” umihi dito. God “bless” our trip?!?!?!), and obsess over past participles (What is the past participle of dive? Anna Oposa has dove? Anna Oposa has dived? Anna Oposa has… diven?). Anna Oposa has not taken a Math subject since high school and is now having problems doing mental arithmetic (“Five plus eight equals twelve? Oh wait shit fifteen right? Oh god where’s that fucking calculator?”). Anna Oposa has given up on MSTs since her Geog 1 teacher cracked the jokes “Ano ang pabiritong kanta ng mga geologists? Eh di bato bato pick!” and “What did one igneous rock say to the other igneous rock? I LAVA YOU!” Those are what Anna Oposa likes to call “jokes.”
Her CAL professors are so much better. Anna Oposa loves her professors. Her professors are her gods. Anna Oposa loves Judy Ick because Judy Ick believes that she is Shakespeare’s mistress. Anna Oposa loves May Jurilla because she has everything Anna Oposa wants: Latin honors, two MAs, one PhD in an obscure subject, and sexy legs. Anna Oposa loves Conchitina Cruz because she expected a professor named Conchitina to be a living fossil that required a respirator to function only to find a bombshell walk in the classroom. Anna Oposa loves Jerome Sanchez, who keeps using Anna Oposa as an example of a noisy girl during Italian recitation (“Anna Oposa è rumorosa!”). Anna Oposa is in love with Carlos Aureus. She believes that a genius like Carlos Aureus could not have been a child; he just materialized and came into existence. Anna Oposa is also smitten with Jose Dalisay Jr. and his booming bass voice that should be used in audio books. So much so that his presence makes Anna Oposa’s IQ drop. When he asked what she thought of Langston Hughes’s “Florida Road Workers,” she said, “It’s about the discrimination against the blacks.” When pushed for further explanation, she stared at him and said, “Cause they’re like… not white?”
Ah, no wonder Anna Oposa’s UPG made it to UP Diliman by 0.1.
Anna Oposa loves UP. Anna Oposa loves the names of her classmates: Fhamaye (“But my nickname’s Alfha.”), El Shadai (“One ‘d’ lang. You can call me Shads for short!”), and siblings Brilliant Hero and Genius Judge (“Our sister’s name is Jennifer.”) Anna Oposa loves the bathroom graffiti in FC. Anna Oposa loves “If loving you means suffering, then bury me alive…” Anna Oposa loves “Fuck you world!” and loves the reply “Fuck you too! –World” even more. Anna Oposa loves being asked which building is where, like when a nurse approached her and asked, “Miss saan yung Pamela Hall?” Anna Oposa replied, “Hah? Sino si Pamela?!” Anna Oposa loves the day when UPCAT results are posted. Parents and high school seniors run their fingers down the bulletin boards and expressions change from anxious to either ecstatic or disappointed. But there’s a reaction Anna Oposa will never forget: the lanky boy who called up his mom and yelled, “Ma! NAKAPASA AKO NG UP DILIMAN!!! At… buntis ang girlfriend ko!”
Rain or shine, Anna Oposa loves UP. Literally. After all, each area in UP has its own stratosphere. It’s sunny in AS, dark in ASCAL, and storming at CAL so by the time she gets to her Post-Colonial Discourse class from Phonetics and Phonology she’s soaked and sneezing. Anna Oposa even loves the old, hard-to-find books in the library that crumble at her slightest touch and the high-tech iLib that never clears her account of books she returned. Half of the librarians are bitchy; they pretend not to hear her and just point her towards the Social Science Stacks, which she thinks could be a perfect setting for a horror movie. The other half of the librarians is incoherent. Librarian 1: Hija, i-ano mo lang ito sa ano. Librarian 2: Eh kung tawagan mo kaya si ano? Librarian 1: Eh sabi ni ano, ano lang naman kailangan eh. Librarian 1: Ano lang naman pala eh! I-ano mo na! All Anna Oposa wants to say is: ano ba talaga? Nevertheless, Anna Oposa loves UP. Really.
Aside from the libraries, Anna Oposa also loves the College of Music because of the cacophony of wind instruments doing scales over and over again at different keys and rhythms which makes her want to drag the NO BLOWING OF HORNS sign from the street to the building’s entrance. Anna Oposa loves UP more than ever because it proves that the idea of an afterlife is imaginary, that heaven and hell are on earth, hell being UP enrollment. But then again Anna Oposa loves UP enrollment because it teaches her to be independent by chasing professors and advisers to sign her add mat forms, who say they’ll show up at a certain time ON THE DAY OF THE DEADLINE but won’t, and then lining up for hours under direct sunlight and/or pouring rain to catch the 4:30 p.m. cutoff to pay for a ten peso “processing fee” only to be told that she’s supposed to go to the Registrar “for approval” even if she argues that the Department told her to go to the Bank first. Anna Oposa even found the perfect soundtrack for this inferno: the sound of the Toki and Ikot horn, a high-pitched cackle when heard in the early evening, making Anna Oposa scream and duck. Then there are the devils from hell on earth a.k.a. the Wild Card UP professors, such as the professor who looks like she dresses in the dark, doesn’t teach, and uses a set of darts for grading and the other professor who has but one facial expression, went to class about six times the entire semester, and gave her a 2.75 for unknown reasons, even if she submitted everything on time, got above-average marks on each paper, and attended every class. Anna Oposa loves UP because she looks studious from carrying a backpack heavy with crumpled blue books, readings, and workshop pieces. One time, Anna Oposa’s friend had Anna Oposa keep her daily feminine wash in Anna Oposa’s backpack. The lid accidentally popped open and for days Anna Oposa’s crumpled blue books, readings, and workshop pieces smelled like a vagina. A vagina "nourished with milk" and "tea tree oil" but a vagina is a vagina and
What again?
Right. Anna Oposa loves UP. Anna Oposa fucking loves UP. Konbanwa from Japan! I'm here until Sunday for the last leg of the Denso Youth for Earth Action. It's below 10 degrees. Nalulurkee ang Southeast Asian blood ko!
This entry (which was originally in two parts) was first published in the WWF-Philippines Facebook site and the Definitely Filipino site, which has over 300, 000 fans. Imagine of all of us put together did all the fifteen here. I really think the best way to show love for country is in the little things. Panis na yung namamatay sa Luneta noh. Ika nga ni Ghandi at ni Efren Penaflorida, "Be the change you seek." I did all fifteen of these before I could write about them.
Since this is my online journal, my candid comments are included in parentheses :)
1. Hold that straw! Plastic straws are among the most abundant debris found on beaches. Marine animals nibble on these, thinking they’re food. Remember: you are fully capable of drinking without the help of a plastic appendage.
(During the International Coastal Clean-Up and UP Clean-Up, we found so many of these. KADIRE.)
2. Donate those tarps! Tarpaulins are made of non-biodegradable and non-recyclable stuff. Instead of throwing them away, donate them to Earth Day Network, an environmental NGO that turns them into schoolbags for less fortunate children around the Philippines. Contact Ms. Binggirl Clemente at earthday_village@yahoo.com for more details.
(Tita Binggirl is AWESOME. She inspires me everyday.)
3. Chuck those (disposable) chopsticks: when dining at any Asian restaurant, bring your own reusable chopsticks. Though wooden chopsticks are biodegradable, they take a long time to decay and just add to the volume of solid waste in dumpsites. The annual production of chopsticks uses up to 90, 000 tons of wood, which comes from trees—climax of the plant kingdom and lungs of the earth.
(I AM PROUD TO SAY THAT MY FRIENDS AND I BRING CHOPSTICKS EVERY TIME WE EAT IN OMAKASE. WHICH IS AT LEAST TWICE A MONTH. Or else Ms. Fernandez goes into a bitch fit with matching hampas sa lamesa.)
4. Think big, buy big. We Filipinos have a tingi-tingi culture where everything must come small. Imagine the amount of waste we’d reduce if we bought in bulk! Instead of buying in sachets, reach for the big bottle. When traveling, just put the contents in smaller, refillable bottles that you can buy in any department store.
5. BamBOO YEAH: instead of planting a tree, plant bamboo—it’s a kind of grass, which means it grows faster. Other bamboo bonuses: it doesn’t need fertilizer, generates 35% more oxygen than a tree, and stores more CO2.
(My dad and I planted bamboos to celebrate his 55th birthday.)
6. When buying ice cream, choose cones over cups. Note: cones are edible, cups are disposable.
(Besides, hindi ba mas fun kumain from a cone?! Mas feel mo ang pagiging bata debah?)
7. Be a botante and not a bobotante: in the upcoming 2010 elections, read up on your candidates. See if there’s any green platform behind the yellow, the orange, and the hand symbols.
(Uuuuy ALAM NA.)
8. Spread the word: one person can make difference if she reduces her waste. But if she tells others, then those others tell even more others, then we can begin to effect change. It may be important to practice what you preach, but it’s equally important to preach what you practice.
9. Paper or plastic? One ton of paper bags is equivalent to 17 trees and generates five times as much solid waste as plastic. One ton of plastic bags consumes 11 barrels of crude oil and takes 1000 years to decompose. The answer: neither - bring your own!
(Last time my mom and I went to the grocery, we were busy talking so mamang bagger put them in plastic bags. Then we freaked out and said we had an ecobag with us. So the mamang bagger put the plastic bags in the ecobag. FAIL. Tinanggal namin malamang!)
10. You can carry an eco-bag or just put your purchase in your own bag. While you’re at it, tell the cashier that you don’t need a plastic bag ‘cause you want to save the world. Trust us, it’ll make her smile.
(And it always does. I do this all the time.)
11. Bring your own water bottle! 2.7 million tons of plastic are used for bottled water annually, about 90% of which end up in landfills. An average mineral water bottle costs about P20. If you stop buying one or two bottles a day, you can save up to P1120 a month. While you're at it, bring your own tumbler too! When you’re going to meet your friends for coffee, hand the barista your own tumbler or ask for your drink in a mug. Starbucks Philippines even gives a P5 discount for those who bring their own!
(Anyone who knows me has seen my huge ass water bottle na mukhang pang dispenser. My Japan Starbucks tumbler is from Bun-Chan, from Japan talaga haha!)
12. Need to reload? Go to your nearest e-load or autoload suki! Those prepaid cards are made from and individually wrapped in plastic.
(I realized this when Ma said she doesn't like buying cards.)
13. Learn to love refillables! When buying pens and highlighters, choose those that are refillable, like Stabilo. That way, when the ink runs out, you no longer have to buy new ones. Just walk to your nearest bookstore and ask for a refill.
14. Eliminate phantom drain: Believe your charger when it says BATTERY FULL - it does not lie. Plugged chargers still consume energy.
(This is my pet peeve. I walk around the house unplugging stuff. I've turned into my father :| )
14. Give me the “green” light: Replace those incandescent bulbs into Compact Fluorescent Lightbulbs (CFLs). They may cost a bit more, but think long-term: CFLs consume ¼ of the electricity and last several years longer. Plus, they look like vanilla swirl ice cream!
15. Tara na, biyahe tayo! Have you trekked the Banaue Rice Terraces, chased after whale sharks in Donsol, and viewed the Chocolate Hills of Bohol? Explore your country’s natural resources to remind yourself what it is you are saving. After all, you can only protect what you love, and love what you experience.
(This is like, my personal mission. 2010 will be Cam Sur, Cebu, Cagayan de Oro, and Camiguin. PROMISE. I need to step foot on Mindanao soil!)
The late Ninoy Aquino said that the Filipino is worth dying for. Echos. Allow me to rephrase: the Filipino is worth living for and most definitely worth greening for. Now go forth and greenify :)
PS: feel free to link, re-post, etc.
by David Gonzales, BS Chemical Engineering major and paper-cutter extraordinaire. The image on the left was made with love by a cutter! Intense ka David!
Step 1: Press the Seal the Deal Stamp made from recycled car materials
Step 2: Sign name
Step 3: Realize that you have just Annafied yourself ng bonggang-bongga (pati legs ko nagkaron ng ink :|)
Step 4: Kebs. What matters is your name and country on the banner that will be wrapped around the building where the Copenhagen conference will be held, as a sign of the youth's support.
In science fiction movies, the end of the world comes in the form of aliens and zombies invading the Earth. The hero shoots and stabs these creatures until they are obliterated. The ultimate sign of victory is when he walks away from an explosion, in slow-mo.
But science is stranger than fiction, and right now, science is telling us that the end of the world can come in the form of climate change. The Greenhouse Gas Emissions (GGEs) from human activity and industrialized countries have caused the global mean temperature to increase significantly. The effects are becoming more and more palpable: more frequent typhoons, floods, tornados, and droughts; faster spread of disease; sea level rise; threatened food security; disruption in the migration patters of species; and coral bleaching. Nine out of ten disasters are now climate change-related. If the temperature hikes up another 3°C, we could lose 40-70% of our species forever. Indonesia, the largest archipelago composed of over seventeen thousand islands, has already lost twenty-four islands in the last two years due to the rise in sea level—that’s equivalent to about an island per month. The Philippines, the second largest archipelago, is even more vulnerable to climate change because we are located at the typhoon belt and Pacific Ring of Fire. A recent satellite photograph of NASA shows that the hottest body of water is right beside the 7, 107 islands we call home.
The strategy for salvation won’t be as easy as grabbing a gun or spade—it requires international commitment for countries to reduce the production of greenhouse gases, the stuff that burned a gaping hole in our ozone layer. The first was the Montreal Protocol in 1989. Its goal was to phase out chlorofluorocarbons (CFCs), the gas released by our old refrigerators, fire extinguishers, and air-conditioners. The second was the Kyoto Protocol of 1997, aimed to reduce four greenhouse gases (carbon dioxide, methane, nitrous oxide, and sulfur hexafluoride) and two other gases (hydroflourocarbons and perfluorocarbons). It will expire in 2013. At the rate our natural sources are being depleted, that isn’t much time to heal the world and make it a better place.
Perhaps the third time’s a charm. From December 7-18, 2009, our real-life heroes in the form of lawyers, scientists, and political leaders from approximately 190 countries are meeting in Copenhagen, Denmark for the Copenhagen Protocol. It will be 15th Conference of Parties in the United Nations Framework Convention on Climate Change. According to www.sealthedeal2009.org, this agreement has four major demands:
1. Industrialized countries “need to agree to ambitious mid-term greenhouse gas reduction targets.”
2. Developing countries need to undertake nationally appropriate actions that will cut their emissions beyond business-as-usual levels.
3. Financing and technological support for both mitigation and adaptation needs… particularly for those countries most vulnerable to the impacts of climate change. This includes an adaptation framework and incentives for reducing emissions from deforestation and forest degradation.
4. An accountable institutional mechanism and equitable governance structure must be established to channel resources efficiently to developing countries.
The problems here lie in the so-called “developed” countries that may not commit because their economy will be at a disadvantage. The United States of America, accountable for over 30% of the GGEs, did not sign the Kyoto Protocol. The current solution of the “developed” countries is for the Global South to reduce GGEs so they won’t have to. They dangle a few million to low-consuming, highly-vulnerable countries as “adaptation funds”, which is really a legalized form of bribery to silence leaders at the international forum. Clean Development Mechanisms, they call it. Such countries ought to redefine their concept of “development”, because they soon will realize that you cannot satiate people with numbers in their Gross Domestic Product.
A recent study showed that if every human being in the world were to copy the lifestyle of an average American, we would need five to nine Earths. We only have one. The upcoming Copenhagen Protocol is crucial for a sustainable society that our generation and the future generations deserve. If our world’s leaders can come to an agreement, only then can we walk away from the explosion, in slow-mo.
***
Thanks to Donna for keeping me sane while writing this, Mariel for the pictures, Kester for getting this published on the UP College of Science newsletter soon and getting Seal the Deal banners from the UN, WWF-Philippines for publishing this in their Facebook site, and David for "illustrating" this.
www.sealthedeal2009.org My first and last videoblog (vlog) about my trip to South Africa was over a year ago! After a new nose and seven countries, I thought it was time to record new ones. Here are two videos on my trips, friends, and UP.
The first time I encountered Odette Alcantara was when I hosted and helped organize Island Cove’s press con on their zero-waste program. She was sitting in the middle of the panelists, throwing her hands up in the air, and cursing government officials for neglecting the Solid Waste Management Act. “Holy shit,” I thought. “This woman is scary and CRAZY.” We would meet several times more because I tagged along my dad’s environmental events. Whenever she’d see me, she’d envelope me into a big hug, kiss me on both cheeks, and say, “Nice to see you here, my Anna Banana!” She’d say it like she were my own lola. She smelled of powder and flowers. Read the rest here. I attended the “Y VOTE? U VOTE!” forum at the UP College of Law on the same day that Noynoy Aquino announced his decision to run for president. I am, more than than ever, convinced to vote and convince you to register and vote. How can I not be when the panel of speakers included Professor Randy David, Governor Grace Padaca, Ms. Bianca Lapuz, and Atty. Marvic Leonen, Dean of the UP College of Law? To read more, please go to my real blog. (I've been nominated for one of the top blogs of the Philippines (chos lang) and I have to show activity there to increase my ranking. Buhayin muli ang livejournal :)   It’s easy to read about what went on in the RM awards. It was all over the news. So let’s talk about what the news didn’t say. First of all, my dad was so funny on stage. Lumalabas ang pagiging ADHD niya, waving at the audience, pumping his fists in the air, doing the thumbs-up sign (oh diba kahit wala siyang Facebook marunong siya ng LIKES THIS). You can catch the last five minutes of his acceptance speech here . (The night before I sang at his thanksgiving dinner. I was on the verge of tears when I was talking because I'm a dork like that. After my second song, "Paraiso," he was in tears din. HAHA. My dad is my liiiife!)
My favorite awardees are Krisana Kraisintu from Thailand and Ka Hsaw Wa from Burma. Ms. Kraisintu told my mom, "I love Filipino food! I can eat adobo everyday!"
she is so cute. kinda reminds me of Edna Mode from the Incredibles.
ka hsaw wa (i love saying his name) is only 39 years old! you can feel his energy and zest for life crackling in the air.
On the way to the awarding ceremony, Uli and I kept singing Manny Villar's jingle. How can you not love it! "Akala mo petiks, yun pala mali/Akala mo conyo, yun pala laking tondo!" When we saw MV in the lobby of CCP we freaked out and had a picture taken with him. Look at those giddy faces!
akala mo trapo yun pala ka-tropa mo! ✔
Ops I am not endorsing MV (or anyone just yet) for presidency ha! Maraming namamatay sa maling akala. So just visit www.akalamo.com for more info (I'm not kidding, it's a real site!) HAHA!
I gathered the courage to introduce myself to Emily Abrera, one of the people I look up to in the field of the arts. I was all like, "Hi you're my idol really you are I really look up to you 'cause... You're the best." WTF?
The highlight was seeing Sec. Ace Durano. Ma and I are huge admirers (understatement!) of his so we kinda went insane when we saw him. I was all like, "Hi Sir!" and he goes, "Anna! You know, I really enjoy reading your blog!"
WHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTTTTTTUUUUUUPPPPP yan na po ang greatest achievement ko in life!!!! Kung pwede lang ilagay 'yan sa resume under "AWARDS RECEIVED"!!!!!
I really think he has the coolest job ever: to go around the most beautiful country on earth and improve its tourism. He has done so much to put us on the map and provide employment through tourism, which is how it's supposed to be. THAT's what I want to do for a living. I'm gonna work for the DOT in my lifetime. I just know it.
After surveying who else we could have a picture with, Uli bumped into Sen. Pia Cayetano. Literally bumped into her. Tapos itong wa-klas kong kapatid yelled, "RAISA SI PIA CAYETANO O, PA-PICTURE TAYO!!!! MARIEL!!! PA-PICTURE TAYO!!!" RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER HAHA ANG JOLOGS!!!!
I congratulated her for making it to the international Ironman competition. How awesome is that? Hardcore athlete!
At the gala dinner, we had our picture taken with Jaime Agusto Zobel de Ayala who's overflowing with sex appeal. Tita Chinky calls him George Clooney.
My dad SANG AT THE GALA DINNER! He sang "Usahay" which is like, the national anthem of the Bisaya (next to "Matud Nila" of course). JAZA said they're gonna change his award from environment to music. Chela!
Papa introduced me to Mareng Winnie, another idol of mine. She advised me to shift from English to Economics. Hmmmm no. Haha. Check out the video of Mikey Arroyo and Mareng Winnie if you haven't yet. "Sue me!" Tanga ni Mikey. Sana hindi nalang siya nag pa-interview. LIKES THIS daw, sabi ni former president FVR
and Cheche Lazaro What an awesome night. *** I can't not write about this. So. Cheche Lazaro. She hosts this show called Media in Focus on ANC. I loved the episode on the National Artist issue because of Sir Dalisay and another man named Alexis Tioseco. (Do watch the video. Very insightful.) Vicky told me that Alexis Tioseo and his girlfriend were shot dead a few days ago. This made me really sad because we need more Filipinos like him: idealistic and passionate. Must reads: his letter to Nika and the extended version of his wishlist for Philippine cinema. I particularly like what he said about the MMFF! True dat. No more Enteng Kabisotes and Mano Pos please! I hope someone from the film/media industry picks up something and makes it his/her advocacy. Several politicians have changed their minds about the 2010 presidential elections. Ping Lacson was the first to, at the height of the Dacer issue. Next is Binay, because he wants to run as Erap’s VP. Erap said he’s willing to drop out as well if the opposition unites for one candidate. Noli De Castro and Gibo haven’t been making noise, which makes me doubt that they’re pushing through. Today Mar Roxas made way for Noynoy Aquino.
Noynoy Aquino for PRESIDENT? SERIOUSLY?!
Okay. I am aware of what the late Cory Aquino has done to go against dictatorship and unite the people in EDSA and how Ninoy Aquino was assassinated and he believed that the “Filipino [was] worth dying for” but we can’t continue to be blinded by all this yellow! Natatawa nalang ako sa mga proposal to rename EDSA to Cory Ave., Cory to be a National Hero, Cory to be on the 500 peso bill (tacky design, btw), and a Cory Aquino Day (as if we didn’t have enough national holidays). Ma pointed out that we drivers curse EDSA a lot for its awful traffic. Turning EDSA into Cory Ave. would mean, “Tang ina talagang Cory Ave. yan o, ang traffic!” Diba ang panget? And Cory could’ve cancelled our foreign debt during her presidency. And the CARPER issue. But of course, no one says anything about it.
I don’t like the Filipino culture of sanctifying the dead.
This Noynoy Aquino for 2010 thing is pushing the yellow fever and milking it to the maximum level. Yes, Noynoy was in the Congress for several years and served in numerous committees and he was Deputy Speaker for two years but these are merely positions, not concrete contributions to the country. Maybe he has the potential to be a great leader. Maybe. But he’s gotta prove that soon if he wants to rule my country. People have to understand that leadership skills are not genetic. Just take a look at all the parent-child political tandems that have “served” in office. Hello GMA and father! Jinggoy and father! The list goes on. The children usually do not exceed or even match what their predecessors have accomplished (bad or good). Likewise, a real legacy is not inherited, it is earned and made. If Cory Aquino hadn’t died this year, Noynoy wouldn’t even be considered for President. So please lang, buksan natin ang ating mga mata.
The qualifications for presidency are extremely flawed. Uli’s status message captured it perfectly: “thinks there's something wrong with your country when the only qualifications for president are; must be age 40 and above, must know how to read and write and must be a Filipino citizen.” Democracy is highly, HIGHLY overrated. I wish we had a two-party system to get rid of nuisance candidates. I wish we had candidates who actually talked about their plans and programs instead of their personalities. I wish, most of all, that we had candidates who love the Philippines more than their personal ambitions of being in power. After all, ambition is nothing without vision.
Honestly I think the quote, “The Filipino is worth dying for” is bullshit in this day and age. We’re not. We shouldn’t die for the Filipinos whose goal in life is to be a nurse so they can leave the country, for the Filipinos who have given up, haven’t registered to vote because they don’t give a shit, and for the Filipinos who are just concerned with arriving at a position so they can commit graft and corruption and build waiting sheds with their names on it. Kalokohan.
It doesn’t matter whether you’re in America, Hong Kong, or the Middle East, whether you are an engineer, domestic helper, caregiver, seaman, or CEO as long as you give a good representation of my country. I do believe that it is worth to fight the good fight and be part of a “society trying to make an imperfect country perfect.” It's worth writing about, talking about, and inspiring others to change their minds through example. The Filipino isn't worth dying for; it's worth living for. Grandmothers are supposed to be made of hugs, kisses, nurturing and sugar-coated advice, and unconditional love. They smell like flowers and incense. My Lola Ditas is unlike any other. She doesn't look a day over sixty. She loves to tap our heads and say, "Maraming laman! Matalino!" and bite our arms. When I told her I'd be in SSEAYP, she said, "Siguraduhin mo lang it's not Sulpicio Lines hehehe baka malunod ka!" She was featured on QTV's One Proud Mama a couple of years back. Rightfully so. She raised seven kids who are all successful in their own ways.
Lola Ditas knows how to e-mail and use MagicJack! She also loves to text in capital letters and give brutally honest advice. Here are some of her messages:
D FORMER CARETAKER SEZ CGURADO DW TIME WIL KAM WEN ME MABUBUNTIS. AY NAKU APARENTLY UR USING D HAUS AS A MOTEL OR AS A BEERHAUS. 4 ME UR OLD ENAF 2 KNOW WAT UR DOING. WAT DO U DO INSIDE DA RUM, PRAY D ROSARY? HA HA HA.
M A VRY REALISTIC LOLA. I KNOW EVERYTING IS HORMONE DRIVEN-- D RAGING N GALLOPING HORMONES OF D YOUNG DEN MAUUNTOG N KYO WEN ITS TU LATE. UR MEN WON'T CONSIDER MARRIAGE WEN DEY KEN HVE PLEASURE WDOUT RESPONSBILITY.
UR YOUNG N UR BEATY IS SO EXOTIC WD D RIGHT PEDIGREE DAT U DESERVE D BEST MAN ONE HU IS INTELLIGENT FOCUSED N HARDWORKING. DAY SHD B UR MINDSET N IT WIL KAM. MINWYL WORK HARD IN UR STUDIES.
UR TITAS LISTENED 2 ME LUK WER DEY R. KAHIT NA MAHIRAP BASTA MATALINO N MASIPAG N ME AMBISYON N ABILIDAD. YONG MGA SOSAYTI BOYS N SPOILD AY NAKU GUTOM ANG MAKUKUHA MO.
NXT TIME U PIK A GUY B SURE HE KEN OFFER U D BEST IN DEM NOT D BEAST IN DEM. HA HA MGA HAYOP TALAGA !
YES DER R MANY BIG FISHES IN D OCEAN. UL CATCH ONE SOMDAY. MINWYL CONQUER DOS RAGING HORMONES AND CNCENTRATE ON UR STUDIES N PLAN WEL UR CAREER.
LYK WEN I MADE ADVICE 2 ABENG PINGGOY N ULI DEY SHD STRIVE HARD SO HINDI CLA SAMDEY HIT SOIL N DEAD HUNGRY. MGA HAMPAS LUPA N PATAY GUTOM.
Like my title says, "Wala ka sa Lola ko!"
I’m not even surprised that Miko and I got caught by the Manila police last Saturday on our way to the Museum of the Filipino people. According to Mamang Pulis, we turned right where we weren’t supposed to. Miko explained, “Wala naman pong nakalagay na NO RIGHT TURN ON RED SIGNAL, at wala rin po sa stoplight na hindi po pwedeng kumanan.” Mamang Pulis insisted that it was a major intersection with a blind curve which IT WASN’T. How can a major intersection have a blind curve?! He said he’d have to confiscate Miko’s license and he could only get it after five working days AND attend a 2-day seminar. “So ano po ba yung best na magagawa namin para sa inyo?” he asked. In other words, “Ano pong best na presyo ang mabibigay niyo sa ‘min?” Miko paused and I could see the wheels in his head calculating how much he should give him. Ganyan talaga pag hindi sanay. So I, Queen of Traffic Violations, stepped in.
“Sir, once again we’re leaving for America on Monday and we won’t be back until December. There really isn’t a sign that says NO RIGHT TURN ON RED SIGNAL ‘cause if there was, we really wouldn’t have turned. There has to be a city ordinance for traffic rules like that, if it isn’t shown on a sign. Besides, the traffic light didn’t have a separate signal for a right turn or any turn for that matter.”
“Ma’am, Tagalog po.”
Miko picked up my cue and added, “Yes Sir, and we’re just going to the National Museum of History and we don’t know where we’re going ‘cause we’re not from here and---”
“Sir, Tagalog! Do you understand Tagalog?”
“A little...”
TANGA EH FIRST HALF OF THE CONVERSATION WIKANG FILIPINO GAMIT NATIN!!!!
The policeman winced and said, “Wait lang Sir I will call my partner! HOY English daw! Dito ka nga!”
In the end the other policeman said, “Ok Ma’am, Sir today we will gib you a chans.”
I love itttt. Now to the real story: the National Museum of History and the Museum of the Filipino people.
We took the tour of John Silva, who calls himself a “writer, a fundraiser, and an advocate for the arts and heritage preservation”. I’m ashamed to admit that I’ve been to the Met, the MoMA, and Guggenheim of New York, and other museums around Southeast Asia but not my own country’s National Museum until yesterday. Credit for this trip goes to Chino, who told me about it.
The museum used to be the Department of Finance until President Ramos recognized the need for a National Museum. I didn’t know that. (Actually the whole tour was like that: “I didn’t know that!”) We started in the Kasaysayan ng Lahi room where lots of pre-colonial artifacts were stored. Reminder: we were not “DISCOVERED” by Magellan. You cannot discover something that already exists. We had a kind of religion, civilization, dance, music, language, and rituals even before the Spaniards bastardized us.
Our ancestors put bones in jars before the soul would journey to the afterlife. This is the “jar of all jars,” over 2, 000 years old. Looks familiar? Check out your 1, 000 peso bill. This very same jar is at the back.
These statues are called “Ang Bulul”. When these were brought into the museum, the lights in the room exploded for 12 days straight. The statues needed to be appeased, they didn’t like being behind glass. Mr. Silva had to get a babaylan (a kind of priest) who did a ritual involving a chicken, ripping its head off, and splattering the blood around the area. After that, the lights never exploded again. Although museum guards have reported that the statues switch places at night. Mmmm Night at the Museum Pinoy version.
according to Miko this is the inspiration behind the Oblation Statue. HAHAHAHA.
Salita Manon is the ONLY dreamweaver left in the country. She induces a 39-degree fever, sleeps, and weaves her dreams when she wakes up. After the Museum of the Filipino People, we headed to the National Museum. I saw the most awesome allegorical Spoliarium by Juan Luna. It was finished in Rome back in 1883. The Romans are the Spaniards while the dead gladiators being dragged are the Filipinos. I never understood the extent of this painting’s impact until yesterday. Luna and Hidalgo were the first Filipinos to join the prestigious Bellas Artes competition in Spain and won first and second respectively. This was a time when Filipinos were called monkeys and indios. Parang, “Omigod how could a Filipino win a Spanish arts competition so kadiri naman yuck.” During the celebration, a man named Jose Rizal said, “If we are equal in the arts, why not in political rights?” This quote sparked the being tibak of Rizal and the Filipinos back home.
It's HUGE. They had to cut this up to transport this to the Philippines.
I loved being here:
There’s this indescribable feeling of being around works of great artists. Manansalas, Ocampos, Abuevas, Franciscos... I get giddy just THINKING about them. Imagine in the future... There will be Panday komiks here. Harakiri time.
1/3 of the Museum’s budget comes from the Congress. The rest come from private corporations. And Tonyboy Cojuangco, who, as it turns out, is not just a patron of Gretchen but of the arts. Another interesting to note is that the museum is free to the general public on Sundays, and free to the poor anyday. You just have to go there and declare that you’re poor. How did this happen? President Erap allocated 50 million pesos for the museum with the condition that it be accessible to the masses. I was pleasantly surprised to learn this. He had a heart for the arts pala. I recommend all Filipinos to go there. I think it’s important to know that these things exist. It gave me a deeper appreciation and a better understanding of our heritage and culture. I prefer taking guided tours over going on my own ‘cause the artifacts get contextualized that way, but it’s really up to you. Do make time for it. To see more pictures and descriptions of my trip: http://www.facebook.com/annaoposa?ref=name#/album.php?aid=138001&id=524913851&ref=mf http://nationalmuseum.gov.ph/ Let me stray from my tibak ways and let my funnies come out. There are people who think TLC stands for either Tender, Love, and Care or T-Boz, Left Eye, and Chilli. For me TLC stands for moments that make you say, “Tang ina!” “Labo!” or “Crazy!”. Like so:
when Uli was in the hospital I gave him a call
me: hi, how are you na? what’s the doctor’s diagnosis?
uli: sabi nung doktor... wala daw kwenta ate ko.
That’s when I knew he was gonna be just fine.
***
chuckie manio, stand-up comedian: I don’t understand girls who say ‘i’m so hungry I could eat a horse!’ eh putang ina titi pa lang ng kabayo busog ka na eh.
***
UP graffiti: love sucks. true love swallows.
***
over text
me: ate, pwede niyo akong bilhan ng CAREFREE FEMININE WASH?
after five minutes
manang pereg: yun ba yung ORACARE?
Yesssssss minty freshhhhhh.
***
Bangkok banyos are funny. These two signs look like kailangan din nilang umihi.
Saw this at the back of a door:
Grabe emphasized talaga na RED and dugo at GALIT ang inodoro!
***
Chocolates my blockmate brought. Nakakagago noh? Adorable.
***
Fiction, poetry, drama, gardening, photograpy and...
***
manman: saan yung e-pass?
zoey: wala eh, salon-pas lang.
***
Uli once had a chess opponent from NU named Vietnam Calasagsag. Say it out loud for full effect.
me: omigod no way!!! what the hell does she look like?!?!?!
uli: ayun, mukhang vietnam calasagsag.
***
Facebook status: Anna Oposa needs new boys.
over YM
jonoderivera: you need new boys?
annaoposa: hahaha yeah i’m bored.
jonoderivera: wanna drink tonight?
Ah eh. Hindi ka na new.
***
Jono sent me this:
This was in a port. Imagine this parked beside Super Ferry (SAKAY NA!)
***
A couple bought a chow-chow from China. They brought it back to the Philippines with its papers and all, and thankfully it passed Customs. a couple of days later, their helper started yelling, “MA’AM! SIR! NAGLALAKAD PO ASO NIYO!!!!!!!!” Turns out the dog was walking on its FRONT PAWS. The couple, bewildered, brought it to a vet who told them it was a.................................... bear. A fucking bear. Hindi lang pala pekeng produkto ang nakukuha sa Tsina. Pati narin hayop.
Inferla, mukha naman itong oso.
***
interview of bb (prounced BEE BEE)
host: tell me, bb, bakit ka BB gandanghari? does it stand for anything?
bb: ano ba! bb is short for BINIBINI! like bb. joyce bernal but without the joyce and DEFINITELY without the bernal!
ano daw?
***
For the win:
Good job, Manila Bulletin!
I thought the arts, OF ALL FIELDS, would be free of PMGA’s obsession for powertripping. Yes she has the prerogative of choosing just as past presidents have, but seriously? SERIOUSLY. Ramon Santos was removed from the shortlist submitted by CCP and NCCA and four were added. How can she put Carlos J. Caparas in the same level as Brocka? He even had the audacity to say that the previously awarded artists are not well-known, and it is his fame that makes this so controversial. PLEASE! He added that F. Sionil Jose is a “sectoral or campus artist... not everyone knows about his work” while “millions of viewers” came to watch his “The Maggie de la Riva Story,” which held the all-time high box office record in 1994. If Mr. Caparas were a true artist, he’d know that real art is not measured by popularity or monetary gain. National Artist for Literature Bien Lumbera’s rebuttal was spot on: “What is the power of Caparas’ art on the consciousness of the masses? His movies were not important.” As for Cecile Alvarez, she founded PETA and for that we don’t question her contribution to the development of a national theatre movement BUT she’s the head of NCCA and the cultural adviser of GMA. Mahiya naman sana siya. There are so many others who deserved that 100, 000 peso prize and 1M project grant, like Dolphy for pioneering Philippine comedy, Ryan Cayabyab for his contributions in OPM, and Bibot Amador. Even if she staged plays in English, she spent her lifetime training theatre artists who went global and/or started their own theatre companies. There’s much more to say but you can check out Inquirer, Star, Sir Dalisay’s blog , and Gibbs Cadiz’s blog for a more comprehensive view. To show my actual support, I attended the “necrological service for the National Artist Award” yesterday, held at the CCP. I made a beeline to my theatre friends where we tied black ribbons to BBQ sticks that later covered the front lawn of CCP. What an overwhelming afternoon. The mere roll call was a miracle: Isabel Diaz, who makes the most beautiful portraits; Carlos Celdran, the “Pied Piper” of Manila; Armida Siguion-Reyna and family; Imee and Irene Marcos, daughters of the original patroness of Philippine art, Imelda (who created this National Artist Award); and actors from every professional theatre company (Rep, Trumpets, Stages, PETA, Tanghalang Pilipino, Dulaang UP). There were directors (Chris Millado, Alex Cortez, Anton Juan, Jose Estrella, Joel Lamangan et al.), stage managers (e.g. Ed Maurillo), writers... It was so exciting to breathe the same air as all these amazing artists, but heartbreaking when we remember why. The program opened with a funeral-like procession of the National Artist seal up the CCP ramp, complete with music and women in black. Bituin Escalante sang the National Anthem, which gave me goosebumps. UP’s Kontra Gapi provided haunting ethnic music that we clapped along to. National Artists for Film and Visual Arts Salvador Bernal and BenCab delivered messages, followed by Renato Lucas playing the cello while the National Artists offered black roses to the funeral wreath. Celeste Legazpi’s represented her father Cesar (National Artist for Visual Arts) by reading a poem about Panday and Pandak (go figure) by (who else?) Vim Nadera. Juana Change performed a hilarious, biting monologue inspired by Cecile Alvarez. Rep. Hontiveros-Baraquel, one of the very few representatives who thinks for herself, spoke about passing a bill on a better, stricter process of choosing our National Artists. National Artist for Literature Virgilio Almario recited a litany that involved a choir response. He was the dean of my college, just retired this year. Whenever I see him in school I get googly-eyed and never say anything. It doesn’t seem enough to say, “Hi Sir”. Parang mas angkop na sabihing, “Magandang umaga po, o pambansang alagad ng sining!” You see, I don’t get starstruck with celebrities like oh, PioloSarahKCRichardRuffaChorvaChenelynYuckZzzzz but put me in front of an artist or a writer and I get hopelessly, helplessly tongue-tied. Por ehemplo I gathered the courage to introduce myself to glass sculptor extraordinaire Ramon Orlina and ended up saying something like, “Hello hi my friend is your daughter Ning she’s my friend yes hi I’m a fan of your work and oh wow hoooooo! I’m starstruck!” He asked, “Oh you’re a friend of Ning ning! What’s your name?” “Um Anna haha” and he shook my hand and said, “LET’S HAVE A PICTURE!” Diyos ko lord ikinahihiya ko yung sarili ko bilang English major! Cheeno and I went up to Jim Paredes as well. He’s so approachable! “What a week for the Philippines,” he said. “It’s so nice to see the Filipinos uniting for a cause like this,” I responded. “Masarap talaga maging Pilipino,” he said with a smile.
i will own an orlina one day!
you gave me a reason for my being and i looove what i'm feeeelin' (oh they have a song entitled "ANNA")
The closing remarks were delivered by Bienvenido Lumbera, followed by the emotional move of the National Artists giving up their medals and all the benefits that go with it: 25k a month, health insurance, and getting buried at the Libingan ng mga Bayani. Imagine.
I think being an artist is never about self-expression. That’s just Step 1. Art is about using your talent and skill for something beyond yourself to influence, make people think, contribute to society, challenge, and be a vehicle of change. I respect these National Artists even more for standing up for what they believe in over money and prestige. That, for me, is the mark of a TRUE National Artist.
A couple of weeks ago, my dad walked into my room at around 10PM with a smile from ear to ear. “There’s something I need to tell you but you can’t tell anyone,” he said.
“Ok, what’s up?”
He sat on my bed and hugged me. “I love you, pangga.”
I was thinking, Mamamatay na ba toh?
“I just got a call that I’m going to be a Ramon Magsaysay Awardee for this year!”
I almost jumped out of my bed. “WOW!! WOW WOW WOW CONGRATS PA!”
“You’re the second person I’m telling. I told Mama because well, she’s my wife. But I wanted to tell you because you’re my soul sister.”
SOUL SISTER AMPUTA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A classic AAO* moment. My dad may be an environmentalist, but a lot of the time he’s more mental than the enviro part. Like most guys, my dad also loves to talk about himself. We call this Good Morning To Myself or GMTM. Due to the RM, the GMTM AAO moments have increased. When we watched the replay of the Ateneo vs. UP game and I remarked, “I still can’t get over it. I can’t believe UP won over Ateneo!” And he said, “Oo nga, LIKE ME! I STILL CAN’T BELIEVE I WON THE RM!”
Okaaaaaaaaay!!!!
Then he went on and picked on Eric Salamat’s surname. “Ngayon lang ako nakakita ng may last name na SALAMAT! What if yung first name niya, WALANG ANUMAN? Tapos yung anak nila, si MARAMING? HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Tapos yung anak ni TY Tang at Eric Salamat si TY SALAMAT! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!” Cue the sound of crickets.
When he’s not being a dork, he’s out saving the Philippines. You can read more about his achievements in the RM page: www.rmaf.org.ph. His profile boasts of his extraordinary pursuits. As a father, he is also anything but ordinary. He taught us to love nature early on by taking us horseback riding up Mt. Maragundon and swimming with sea turtles and little sharks in Bantayan, Cebu. Not a lot of people know this, but he was the first person who believed I could write. When I was about 8 years old, I would write short stories (gone are those days when I could write fiction) and he’d edit them, type them up and print them out. I got thrilled in seeing my stories “published”. To this day, he is still my most valued consultant. Whenever I’m in doubt, my dad sends me e-mails, texts, or little Post-its to give me strength and encouragement. When I thought about shifting to BS Psych because my mom wanted me to be a doctor, he told me I had a gift that I should develop to change minds and touch hearts. In my shows, he cheers loudest, yelling in his deep bass voice, “ANAK KO ‘YAN!” during the curtain call. When I didn’t want to file my LOA for SSEAYP ‘cause I’d be delayed, he told me there was no need to rush education and my sabbatical leave would be one of the best things that would ever happen to me (and it was). During my leave, I went around the Philippines with him (Palawan, Bacolod, Iloilo, Donsol, Cebu, etc.) and worked in his NGO, making us almost inseparable. Kahit 3 ng umaga, ginigising niya ako para magtrabaho! Nakakaloka siya. But I guess that’s passion for you; it knows no time and space.
I refuse to believe that there is no hope for my country and that the Philippines can only be recognized for boxing, our corrupt government, and OFWs. My dad and everything he has done is the inspiration behind everything I do in the fields of theatre, creative writing, and environmental activities. It’s ridiculous how much I love, respect, and admire him. My Tito Boying said you should only marry someone who will match or exceed your father’s achievements. I doubt such a man exists.
***
The Ramon Magsaysay Awarding will be in CCP at 4:30 PM, August 31, Monday. It’s open to the public so please go if you’re available. I’ll be there with my friends and family, trying to hold back my tears!
*Antonio A. Oposa Jr.
Last week, I attended the State of the Nanay Adress in UP (a spoof of the real SONA) in support of the passage of the Reproductive Health Bill. I was surprised to see they had a set and costumes and confetti! The “staff” held signs that read “PALAKPAK! MAGAGALIT SI MA’AM!” The new PGMA impersonator is much better than Ate Glo. She was introduced as Goria Makasakal Arroyo.
She began by enumerating recent events, such as Pacman winning, MJ dying, and Juday and Ryan getting married ("Congrats Judaiii!). Some of her outstanding plans and programs:
-Outsourcing the Transformers and Optimus Prime for the Department of National Defense (BONGGA!!)
-Making Recto a one-stop shop for fake diplomas/intl. driver's licenses/etc so it'll be easier for OFWs to leave
-Promoting medical tourism by lowering the price of silicone ("AND I WILL BE THE MODEL!")
-Changing the national dance from carinosa to CHA-CHA
-Masahista training to decrease the rate of unemployment
Then a voice over started talking to her. "Goria, goria... Ako ang iyong konsensya." Goria: "MERON PA BA AKO NON?" On to the facts and figures relevant to the RH BIll: -There are 400, 000 induced abortions in the Philippines every year -30% of those who are preggerz are below 18 y.o. -Poverty incidence is higher among BIG families in the Philippines -61% of married women in the Philippines DO NOT want additional children -92% of Filipinos believe in contraception and family planning She said she didn't want to pass the RH Bill because "mawawalan ako ng credibility." Actor: "MERON KA PA BA NON?" The play ended with the mommies dancing to "We Are Family" and Goria declaring that the RH Bill be passed in 20 days. I wanted to smack Lito Atienza for saying "Walang problema sa overpopulation! Marami tayong human resources." And this article on a 9-year-old getting raped and excommunicated really pissed me off as well. This isn't a question of religious beliefs or morality. It's an issue of practicality and applying what best suits our country's needs.
***
Today's SONA was an applause festival. 124 times in one hour. It's funny how she would pause to cue applause and the audience would pause for mga 2 seconds before they'd clap. Her teeth and gums are of equal size; it was quite distracting. And can you say... Overbite much? Her eyes kept moving which indicated weakness... She should've looked at one teleprompter per paragraph or memorized it ala Obama. I thank her for the nice roads that lead to Clark/Tarlac/Baguio and the NAIA3. For putting Ace Durano as DOT Secretary. Howeverrrrrr.
There was a lot of talk on economic stability. Saan?! Bakit hindi namin nararamdaman?! Before we can be economically stable, we have to fix the "building blocks" of a nation.
-She talked about employing 100, 000 English teachers. For what? To give Filipinos a fake, annoying American accent for call centers? What about improving our Filipino?! It's our national language and yet we have such little material translated in Filipino.
-How can she say she gives importance to education when a professor in UP with a Ph. D. earns 3, 000 pesos A WEEK? State University na yan ha.
-I don't know what to say about the standardized test for college admissions. We had that before, didn't we? Hmmm. What's with the "two years of pre-university education and three years of university education"? Can someone clarify this for me?
-Improved weather predictions? Kamusta naman last June, with the storm that never came? One Twitter update said horoscopes were more reliable than PAGASA.
-"Those who should be in jail should not threaten it, especially if they have been there." HELLO ERAP!
-"Don't pussyput. Don't say bad words in public." HELLO MAR!
-How funny her comments to the people she would point out. "Good job, Jennifer!" "We love you, Lea!" "Good luck Gigi!" and "Mabuhay ka, Manny!" (San si Jinky?)
-Favorite sentence: "THANK! YOU! CONGRESS!"
-Her plans concerning the environment were so abstract. Where's the action, Madame? She signed EO 774 last December which addresses climate change. Where's the implementation?
GMA could've been a great president. She has education from Assumption, Ateneo (?), UP, and Georgetown. She's hardworking, punctual, and disciplined. She just wasn't ready for that kind of power and she married an idiot.
I'm so ready for 2010. It's time for change. I will not vote for anyone who claims s/he will run because "GOD TOLD ME TO." PGMA said God whispered to her. Look where that got us. My goodness. Anyway, ANC Leadership Forum III tomorrow. Can't wait!
Sources: www.twitter.com/ancalerts, Carlos Celdran's Facebook, Mariel Alfonso, and discussions with my family and friends. Pictures from the State of the Nanay Address from Facebook.
 | changes | Jul 22, '09 2:26 AM
for everyone |
After 9 months of being an out-of-school youth, I was able to survive my first month of school. (Oh diba, parang nanganak lang.) My living-out-of-a-suitcase gypsy life will resume for a few days next week when I go to Bangkok to deliver a presentation on the status of the environment in the Philippines (wow it sounds so serious naman) and in October, when I fly to Japan for a two-week program, but otherwise I am a full-time BA English Studies major in English language student in UP Diliman. All my classes begin at freakin’ SEVEN IN THE MORNING! Helloooooooooo. I’m not a morning person AT ALL, but my crankiness is appeased because I love my course, my school and learning in general. Like Danni said, “hand of god” talaga na hindi ako pumasa ng BS Psych. I am Chem 16- and Math 17-free! Math-free in general! I doubt I’d look forward to going to school everyday if I had to write lab reports or study theorems.
UP has changed a bit because of the tuition increase. May gate na ang Velasquez at E. Jacinto St.! Na-renovate na ang banyo ng CMC! May Wi-Fi na ang CAL! However, a new breed of freshmen has arrived. The kind that makes their yayas and moms line up during enrollment. One freshman was spotted eating on the AS steps beside her yaya who was holding her food. Whatever happened to a student body from all walks of life?! Hindi nga naglalakad tong mga ‘to eh. Nasan na ang mga graduate ng obscure schools like Mother Goose High School? But anyway, no matter what they do, freshmen will be freshmen. I saw a crowd of freshmen looking for the Arcellana lib standing outside Prof. Garcella’s room, asking each other, “Dito ba tayo manonood ng film?”
I’ve missed the craziness of UP too. All the ‘puCHA PGMA!' 'RAGE AGAINST THE REGIME!' 'COUNTDOWN TO PGMA'S STEPDOWN!’ hullabaloo. I just came from the RH Bill protest earlier today. It’s nice to be around my loud loud blockmates. And the random graffiti. There was invitation on the board to “COME JOIN THE UP EATING GIANTS!” Wtf. My favorite so far is, “Masarap maglakad sa ilalim ng ulan... Hindi nahahalata ang aking mga luha...” A scribble underneath reads: “PATI IHI MO!”
Another major difference is living in UP Village with my cousins and Kuya. Because we live behind Maginhawa St. (a.k.a. row of restaurants) our house is permanently infested with all kinds of gross things. It’s a paragon of all things I ABSOLUTELY HATE: stray cats, dogs that bark and howl at 3 AM, cockroaches, and rats. One morning I walked in the house and saw a cat perched on my brother’s bed, staring at me with its eerie beady eyes. I flattened myself against the door and screamed until the neighbor’s helper whisked it away. UGHHH. The roaches come here to die. I’m not kidding. Araw-araw merong mga nakabaliktad na ipis sa sahig, waiting to be swept outside. FML. I was brainstorming on how to kill our neighbor’s dogs (thank you to all the comments on my Facebook status with the suggestions: peanut butter, ham bones, chocolate, etc.) but I opted for a diplomatic procedure and wrote our neighbor a letter stating that their dogs have caused poor academic performance. HAHA! But heyyy it’s kinda true. It’s not fun to stay awake for an hour listening to them howl when you gotta get up for a 7AM class. They sent a letter of reply saying “Welcome to the village! Please drop by so we can get to know you better.” Dun dun dun...
Another problem about living here is my meal plan. It’s common knowledge that I don’t can’t cook so if Manang Pereg, cook extraordinaire, doesn’t pack anything for me to eat for the week, I starve instead of eating instant/canned food. It’s too expensive to eat out all the time. I wish I had a fairy godmother for domestic needs. Keri lang. The most important thing in my life is wi-fi. That makes all well in this world.
Terms and other changes of the semester:
FOB (Friendship over, bitch) is now FNH (Friendship never happened.). Mas solid.
TTYL (Talk to you later) is now TTYN (Talk to you never). c/o urbandictionary.com
Cheka is now chela. (Mof’s ingenuity.)
Jologs is now grepa (derived from the bankrupt Great Pacific.)
FML (Fuck My Life) is now LML (Love My Life), courtesy of Juancho Borja (2009). It’s time to start thinking positive. Except when your house is a cockroach graveyard.
Watching plays > watching movies. This year I’ve seen I Love You Because, the 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee, The Fantasticks, Zsa Zsa Zaturnnah, Atang (play of the year), a preview of Tick Tick Boom!, and Dead Stars/Sepang Loca. Soon to open are Lulu, Spring Awakening (!!!), and Sweeney Todd (!!!).
Spirituality > religion. I have not been to Catholic mass at all this year but I am more energized and at peace than I’ve ever been. Must be all the yoga and cupcakes I’ve consumed.
Carlos Celdran’s blog (www.carlosceldran.com) is better than Patricia Evangelista’s editorials for commentaries on current events.
Chos is still chos, the word that means nothing but can mean everything. It’s timeless. I have found the answer to why we are still a developing country. Kasi mga bata, noong unang panahon, walang ginawa ang ating mga bayani kundi mag Facebook. Parang ngayon. 
May inner slut pala si Melchora Aquino! At kamusta naman, badaf pala si Mabini? In na in ang lolo (or lola) mo sa gay lingo. 
HAHAHA SISA!!!!
 Naging Hayden Kho si Padre Damaso? In an article of Yes! or Ok!, pinakita ang travel scrapbook ni Dra. Vicky Belo at Dr. Hayden Kho. The caption of their picture in Paris says: "Wala ang Eiffle Tower sa tower mo!" Mmmm. I saw him at the Manila Hotel a couple of weeks ago and he does look yummy. I just stared and stared. Ang kinis at ang tangkad niya! All lifted from www.noypi.me “You don’t become a teacher because ‘ay wala na kasi po akong mahanap na ibang trabaho’. I became a teacher because I wanted to save the world. Ganon, messianic diba? It doesn’t feel worth it when you get your paycheck. My sisters always ask me, ‘Eh bakit ka pa nagtuturo tapos magrereklamo ka na wala kang pera? You’re so much smarter than that and you can be anywhere in the world!’ And I tell them, ‘Because (in a nasal voice) I LOVE MY COUNTRY!’”
We laugh.
“You’re laughing because I say it that way, but I mean that to the core of my bones. America doesn’t need another teacher with a PhD; they have many of those already... But we do.”
*
“I don’t know how to gauge if my students have learned from me. I can only offer you anecdotes. One time, a former student left me a card. It wasn’t even signed; hindi siya sumisipsip or anything. And in deep Tagalog he or she said something like, ‘Hindi po ako makakaalis ng UP na hindi ko masasabi ‘to sa inyo... Noon akala ko wala pong halaga si Shakespeare sa isang anak ng mangingisda mula sa Navotas...’ and I sat there and cried and cried. Just thinking about it again is making me cry. PRICELESS ‘YON. Oh diba parang pang-Mastercard? Priceless. So you may not get paid well, pero pang-Mastercard ang bayad sa ‘yo.”
And we all get secretly weepy inside as well.
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“I will be the first to tell you to go out and get further education elsewhere. If you don’t come back, I won’t look so highly on you but I can’t blame you either.”
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“Whenever there are foreigners who come here, they say, ‘Your students are so good! How can they be so good when you have no money?!’ Aba, showbiz yata tayo dito sa UP! But let me tell you the upside to this no-money business: our lack of resources make us resourceful. And that’s something that we---that you should be proud of.”
Ick, Judy (2009)
English 191
One of the reasons I want to become a teacher is because of professors like Ma'am Ick and the many, many life-changing, inspiring teachers I've had in UP, in CAL, in DECL. They make Beowulf come alive. They make the Norman Conquest of 1066 relevant. They make us see the beauty of syntax, morphology, semantics, and pragmatics. May mga moments na gusto ko nalang tumayo at pumalakpak na dahan-dahan habang nakapikit. With matching shake of head para drama.
Our tuition (SN 06 and below) is about 6, 500 per semester, but you can't put a price on learning, on passion. And especially not on our professors :)
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